F@#% You 2016 -or- So Long, 2106, I’m Outta Here *mic drop*

F@#% You 2016 -or- So Long, 2106, I’m Outta Here *mic drop*

I’m sitting on the couch, post-Christmas mayhem, amidst a mountain of overpriced children’s toys, . pivoting and repositioning thanks to a piece of Lego that’s worked its way under my a$$. I’m staring at my keyboard committed to coming up with nice things to say about this past year… but… it ain’t easy. 2016 has been tough. Not so much for my family, but the […]

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Merry Frick’n Christmas -or- Wake Me When It’s Over

Merry Frick’n Christmas -or- Wake Me When It’s Over

T’was the night before Christmas and all through the house, not a creature was stirring… cuz we hired an exterminator in August and that pretty much took care of the problem. Just put the kids down for the night and I’m telling ya, it was like a WWE event crossed with the running of the bulls. I might as well have given them an espresso […]

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Getting It Right The First Time -or- Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda.

Getting It Right The First Time -or- Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda.

We’ve all heard of experiencing the phantom ring of our cell phones on silent mode when we don’t actually have a cell phone anywhere on our bodies. We get that brief tickle and our brains say to us, “Hey dude! Answer your phone!!”. Well, in addition to the phantom ring, I sometimes experience phantom fat. This is when the parts of our bodies that used […]

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A Letter To My Future Teenage Daughters Re: Social Media -Or- Oo Baby, It’s A Wild Cyber-World

A Letter To My Future Teenage Daughters Re: Social Media -Or- Oo Baby, It’s A Wild Cyber-World

I noticed a post on Facebook this morning whilst wiping the coffee from my keyboard. It was by an actor friend of mine, Eugene Glazer. We worked together a million and eight years ago on the Warner Brothers TV series “La Femme NIKITA”. He was going on about all the inaccuracies , lies and fabrications that inundate the Internet daily. Many of the points he […]

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The Secret of My Healthsess -or- That Text From Greg Started It

The Secret of My Healthsess -or- That Text From Greg Started It

A friend of mine texted me the other day asking about my fitness regimen. I don’t talk much about my weight loss on social media. Plus, the first rule of Fit Club is shut the hell up about Fit Club! I’m not out to gain attention with my tale of cut calories and worn out running shoes. My journey is a bit selfish really. It’s […]

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The Not So Harrowing Tale of Snow Fluff -or- Nothing Good On TV Tonight, So…

The Not So Harrowing Tale of Snow Fluff -or- Nothing Good On TV Tonight, So…

Our youngest daughter, Miranda – the creative one – is an intrepid member of the Girl Guides of Canada. Two weeks ago she achieved all of the requirements necessary to confer on her the distinguished title of “Brownie”. And I couldn’t be more proud. As you know, Girl Guides is synonymous with all things crafty. I have paper mache masks, half completed bird houses and […]

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Happy Hallowe’en!!!

Happy Hallowe’en!!!

We made it through another Hallowe’en without my wife getting arrested for scaring the ba-jeezuz out of the local children. I sometimes have thoughts that I’ll be explaining all of this to a psychiatrist one day. Anyhoo, all the best from my family to yours! Have a safe and happy Hallowe’en!!

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Juliette The Gymnast -or- I Can Do That But I Don’t Wanna!

Juliette The Gymnast -or- I Can Do That But I Don’t Wanna!

Backwards roll, front handspring, one hand cartwheel, press handstand, back layout with half twist, round off, cartwheel, tuck jump, backwards roll to pike, 180 split leap. Just beautiful! Of course I’m talking about the other kids. Mine is doing none of these. She’s the fiery little 5 year-old blonde chick lying on the mat in the middle of the gym like a bag of wet […]

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Strangerer Things -or- My Corpse Bride!

Strangerer Things -or- My Corpse Bride!

For the most part, my wife and I are polar opposites. Why we’re attracted to each other the way we are is sometimes beyond me considering how different we are. She’s a night owl. I’m a morning person. She’s a social butterfly. I’m an introvert. She retains medical knowledge like a Cardiothoracic Anesthesiologist. I can’t even pronounce “Cardiothoracic Anesthesiologist”. What we do have in common […]

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The 47 Year-Old Nerd -or- My Big Fat Geek Wedding

The 47 Year-Old Nerd -or- My Big Fat Geek Wedding

One of the reasons I got married was so I wouldn’t have to work so hard to get a date. I know it sounds ridiculous but it’s the hand-on-the-bible, hail Mary full of grace, God’s honest truth. Not because my lovely wife ever has second thoughts about going out with me (God, I hope she doesn’t have to think twice), but now that I’m married […]

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