Flu Bug, Don’t Bother Me…

Day 2.5 and I’m locked in an epic battle with the dark side of the flu. So far I’m holding my own but two missed days of work is enough. Thank God for sick pay!!

I used to be the guy that never got sick. I could have replaced Bruce Willis in “Unbreakable”, but there was a scheduling conflict and… well, that’s a story for another time. But really, what happened? All I can think of is that something happened to my immune system around the time my daughter started daycare last year. Hmmm, daughter + daycare = sick daddy. It all makes sense now. Actually this bug was probably given to me free of charge the other day by a friend of my wife and mine. She was on the tail end of the flu. My wife accidentally picked up her water bottle. I kissed my wife goodnight. Bingo bango, one sick daddy-o. Short of having a toilet strapped to my a$$ and a stomach containing at least 1700psi of inescapable gas, I’m doing swell. And by swell I mean I want to die!

OK, I’m being somewhat melodramatic. But when I’m sick EVERYONE will know about it!! So EVERYONE sing it with me:

Flu bug, don’t bother me. Flu bug, don’t bother me. Flu bug, don’t bother me or I will barf on somebody!!